Sometimes nothing seems worse than finally having a private time with someone you crush/love and then babbling uncontrollably, like some sort of nightmare where you can’t stop. Practicing a few calming techniques before you see them can help calm your nerves.
Taking the initiative and getting closer to them will help you overcome the next hurdle. Finally, paying attention to your body as you speak will help you maintain control and confidence in yourself.
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Calm down before you see them
Breathe when you see the person you love and start to feel excited and nervous, focus on your breathing. Remember that your lungs receive less oxygen when you take short, rapid breaths, which causes your heart to speed up and your body to strain. Encourage deeper breaths by imagining your lungs in the abdominals.
Train on your own so it’s easier to do when your crush is there.
Use music to relax.
If you know you’re going to see the person you love all the time, listen to something relaxing first, if you can. Create a playlist full of relaxing music on your device.
Whatever music you choose, the keyword is “relaxation”.
The rhythms of your body naturally synchronize with those of the music.
Be confident in your appearance.
Don’t worry about those little flaws that you want to get rid of. Plus, don’t worry about trying to turn yourself into a certain “guy” that you think your crush might like. Dress as you wish or hair as you want. Be yourself and own!
Of course, people are drawn to certain looks. But it’s been shown that people are likely to react much faster to your level of confidence than to your appearance.
As long as you act confidently in your appearance, they’ll be more blown away by your self-confidence than your hair color.
Invite them to talk about themselves. Once you’ve drawn them into the conversation, keep the spotlight on them early to draw them in more deeply. Think of yourself as an interviewer and ask lots of follow-up questions.
Flatter their egos by showing them that you care about what they’re thinking and giving yourself a chance to feel more comfortable around them before the spotlight turns on you.
Keep the bright things. Take the pleasant conversation that goes to the topics that appreciate both. Do not push them away by selecting them separately.
That doesn’t mean you have to lie and say you love them. Be honest, but be carefree. Just say you can’t come in and let it go.
So use some of its aspects as a stepping stone to something you can talk about positively. For example, if an actor in that movie was in a movie you like, change the subject by saying something like, “Oh, but you know what Tom Hardy movie I like …?”
On the other hand, if you both thought a movie was terrible, feel free to go along with it and split it up if you both like to do it.